Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Naughty four letter word!

Okay, before we have any rib tickling jokes, I have to admonish an otherwise wonderful person by the name of Eileen. She left a comment yesterday and used a VERY naughty four letter word...I was aghast, not only that, but horrified and stunned. She used the word...are you ready for this....yup, the word "iron", as in ironing. In her sweet innocence she believed that eco me who hangs out her clothes to dry, would then have to iron them. Now, one great rationale (I can think of TONS) for not ironing is that it fits in with my "save the planet" ideology, so let's not waste electricity. Another thing is that Eileen said in her post yesterday that she liked old chipped things and one would hope that she could only make room in her heart for wrinkled things as well! I, for one, have long thought that wrinkled clothes add character (one can even hear people, who are probably a tad jealous, walking by and saying "Look at that character with the wrinkled clothes".) In fact, if your clothes are too wrinkled there are several options:

1. Walk with your hands holding your clothes down and make them look ironed.

2. Walk with a severe limp and people will think you can't physically manage to iron.

3. Skip, sing Disney songs and people will never notice your clothes.

4. Walk with panache and act like this is the new IN look.

5. Walk with your husband/friend and make sure they are MORE wrinkled.

Just be creative here...the possiblities are endless. Incredibly (before my lobotomy) when I was first married, I ironed EVERYTHING...sheets, washcloths towels, even underwear, for pete's sake! Of course I was also eighteen, stationed in Alaska, alone all day with no television or radio and a (great) husband who was in the Army and away for 10+ hour days.

If you MUST iron, I have found two delightful ironing boards....the first is so high only the world's tallest man (notice I didn't use woman?) can use it.

This next one was tossed up there (where it obviously belonged to begin with) by an ecologically minded person (or by Gabey who threw his stuffed animal in a tree, but maybe not as he's kinda little to do an ironing board). Or, with a long extension cord, you can both enjoy the outdoors as well as add a lot of excitement to ironing!

Now, for the jokes....

So Far, So Good
So far today, God, I've done all right. I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my temper, haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or over-indulgent. I'm really glad about that.
But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed and from then on I'm probably going to need a lot more help.

Matter of Perspective
Three preachers sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. "Kneeling is definitely best," claimed one.
"No," another contended. "I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven."
"You're both wrong," the third insisted. "The most effective prayer position is lying prostrate, face down on the floor."
The repairman could contain himself no longer. "Hey, fellas, " he interrupted, "the best prayin' I ever did was hangin' upside down from a telephone pole."

More than Asked For
Johnny, a very bright 5 year old, told his daddy he'd like to have a baby brother and, along with his request, offered to do whatever he could to help. His dad, a very bright 35 year old, paused for a moment and then replied, " I'll tell you what, Johnny, if you pray every day for two months for a baby brother, I guarantee that God will give you one!"
Johnny responded eagerly to his dad's challenge and went to his bedroom early that night to start praying for a baby brother.
He prayed every night for a whole month, but after that time, he began to get skeptical. He checked around the neighborhood and found out that what he thought was going to happen, had never occurred in the history of the neighborhood. You just don't pray for two months and then, whammo- a new baby brother. So, Johnny quit praying. After another month, Johnny's mother went to the hospital. When she came back home, Johnny's parents called him into the bedroom. He cautiously walked into the room, not expecting to find anything, and there was a little bundle lying right next to his mother. His dad pulled back the blanket and there was -- not one baby brother, but two!! His mother had twins!
Johnny's dad looked down at him and said, "Now aren't you glad you prayed?"
Johnny hesitated a little and then looked up at his dad and said, "Yes, but aren't you glad I quit when I did?"

Thank you.
In Jesus name. Amen

~~~Thank you Lord, for the blessings of being able to laugh at ourselves and with others.


  1. This was adorable! I loved the jokes! And I loved the naughty word!
    I never iron either! Unless my husband needs a shirt for a wedding, and then I'll retrieve the iron and the ironing board from the back of the closet where it is buried!
    I have a friend that is exactly like you used to be, she irons EVERYTHING, even her sheets, blue jeans, and pajamas!
    You know, Marcy, you could get one of those old-fashioned non-electric irons, make a little campfire out back, put the iron on the hot coals, and there you have it!
    I love coming here each day!

  2. LOL! Loved the jokes! &:o) And the ironing board in the tree! I showed Gabey that and he giggled, but wanted to know, "How did that GET there?"
    But, I have to admit ~ about ironing... I really don't mind doing it. In fact, I kind of enjoy it, and I'll tell you why before you think I'm nuts. You see, it's a ploy for time alone! I gather up all my husband's work shirts, etc during the week, and pile them up on my bed on Saturday morning, supply myself with a big cup of coffee, and tell my husband to keep the Littles out: I'm IRONING! Irons are dangerous and small children should not be around them, you know... And, then I have at least an hour, maybe two, to watch tv, drink coffee, and smooth away wrinkles. (See, that's not too nuts, is it?)

  3. I loved Lisa's reason for ironing,you go girl! I only iron when I'm sewing and if I would have known how much ironing is involved with sewing,I probably would have never started. Too late now. As always Marcy, I love your jokes! Thank you for the laugh.

  4. Oh Marcy you are priceless, and I am so glad I have found your blog. You are kind, funny and love your family. So many blessings my friend and I know you realize and appreciate everyone of them....Have a beautiful day.....:-) Hugs

    IRON....is a four letter word to me as well!

  5. Thanks for the great advice on ironing LOL I have come to be very fond of those wringles. The jokes were great too. I hope you have a beautiful and blessed day ♥

  6. Very, very funny! Now I have to get ready for work. If I'm smiling today and no one knows why, so much the better...Have a grand day! Cathy


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