Wednesday, September 30, 2009

***Marcy Poppins Popping Back In***

Where did Poppins go?
Oh where can she be?
Did she go to see a show
Or a grandson at Karate?
She went to see a friend
She went to bring a smile
And visit for awhile
But really, in the end
Some parts in her did mend.
For the blessings, you see
though for Cheryl were meant to be
Humbly came right back to me
And blessed us all three incredibly.
Well, I brought some photos of Sadie May, our stray, with me on my visit to Ria, hoping they would 'charm' her or 'disarm' her feelings of anxiousness about this pit bull stray, but she just looked and said nothing...
Hopefully we will get a call from the vet's office saying that her state approved (and paid for) spaying has been okayed and then she might get spayed this Friday (please dear Lord). Plans call for still giving another try to finding a loving home for her, but if not, she may become ours...
Since I can't give you pictures of Ria's family (due to her uncomfortableness with online stalkers etc.), I will give you a pretty 'incognito' photo of Julia with Jonathan's older karate belt on and he now has graduated to the next level and is the proud owner of a purple belt.....

My planned visit with Cheryl turned out to be one of the short shifts ( 3 hours) of people staying with her. When Carolyn asked if I'd like to stay for a shift that someone else couldn't make, I said "Absolutely."
As always, Cheryl was loving and gracious and the swelling had gone down in her legs completely so she was able to walk. When I asked Carolyn if she thought Cheryl would want pictures, she said "I doubt it, since she looks so bad now." So, I said nothing and surprise, Cheryl said she'd like to take pictures! Now Cheryl just turned 53 yrs. old and is younger than Carolyn and I, but cancer has made her look older. This picture was taken in Cheryl's living room where her hospital bed is located off to the right of us.....

We talked and talked about funny things that happened at the bank. We did a little serious talking too and Cheryl choked up once and then we started laughing again. Cheryl did mention that she had some things she'd still like to do and hoped that maybe she had a couple of years left (please keep this is prayer for her).
Being my crazy self, I asked for a goofy photo and got one...

1. The Nature of Friendship
"Friendship essentially involves a distinctive kind of concern for your friend, a concern which might reasonably be understood as a kind of love. Philosophers from the ancient Greeks on have traditionally distinguished three notions that can properly be called love: agape, eros, and philia. Agape is a kind of love that does not respond to the antecedent value of its object but instead is thought to create value in the beloved; it has come through the Christian tradition to mean the sort of love God has for us persons as well as, by extension, our love for God and our love for humankind in general. By contrast, eros and philia are generally understood to be responsive to the merits of their objects—to the beloved's properties, especially his goodness or beauty. The difference is that eros is a kind of passionate desire for an object, typically sexual in nature, whereas ‘philia’ originally meant a kind of affectionate regard or friendly feeling towards not just one's friends but also possibly towards family members, business partners, and one's country at large (Liddell et al., 1940; Cooper, 1977a). Given this classification of kinds of love, philia seems to be that which is most clearly relevant to friendship (though just what philia amounts to needs to be clarified in more detail)."

My only regret over this precious and enjoyable visit is that I did not pray over her. I talked about praying for her and having her on our church's prayer chain , but I really wish that I would have prayed over her as well...sometimes I could kick myself!! Here's what can happen when you try to hold the camera and take a picture of all of the people together...

And if that goofiness above didn't make you smile, maybe these will.....

Confucius Say ...
Confucius say, "When you are angry at neighbor, walk a mile in his shoes. Then you will be a mile away from him, and you will have his shoes!"


Hot Horseradish
A minister who was very fond of pure, hot horseradish always kept a bottle of it on his dining room table. Once, at dinner, he offered some to a guest, who took a big spoonful.The guest let out a huge gasp. When he was finally able to speak, he choked out, "I've heard many ministers preach hellfire, but you are the first one I've met who passes out a sample of it."


Top Sign That You've Already Grown Up

6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
Your potted plants stay alive.
You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
Grocery lists are longer than macaroni & cheese, diet Pepsi & Ho-Ho's.
You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as 'dressed up'.
Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
You're the one calling the police because those darn kids next door don't know how to turn down the stereo.
Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt .
~~~Heavenly Father, thank You for the blessings of being able to help one another through kind words and actions.

Friday, September 25, 2009

One long funny tale and some teeny tiny news and mushrooms again

I keep on trying to get some great mushrooms but I don't have much to work with here in Georgia...apparently only the fancy ones live in Wanda's neck of the woods, but the deluge from Atlanta that hit us, left some new mushrooms everywhere, even to the left of the front door (never happened before)...

How about this cluster of three...aren't they kind of cute and different?...

Here come new mushrooms all in a curve again....

It's a VERY long curve too....

Here's a close up of one of the flattened out topped ones...think I'll call them umbrella mushrooms...

This is a perky little guy, so I'll call him a button mushroom (the rest of his family is in the background)...

The news is that I am going out of town to see my grandson's next karate 'graduation' as well as to visit with my friend Cheryl and I will be back Monday. Our mutual friend Carolyn (and I ) will be taking one of the shifts that someone else couldn't take to stay with Cheryl. I'm bringing some books, magazines and few little surprise goodies for her.
If I was REALLY energetic, I could travel this way, but whoa, can you imagine how heavy all that stuff would be to pedal even a short distance?...

Even on a short trip, it seems you have to take half of the house with you. Years ago I heard some words of wisdom about traveling and it said to go ahead and pack and get your money ready, then go back, remove half of what you packed and then go back and double the money you are taking...

Except that he's much cuter and fluffier, this could be Oliver wanting to go along for the ride....

Our little stray tested positive for heartworms so we have her on the long term method of eliminating them (this is also the least expensive as well). She remains as sweet natured as ever and has yet to let out one teeny tiny growl even playfully. The cats are now walking past her and sticking their noses up at her as if she isn't a real dog! Good Lord willing the state of GA will pay for her to be spayed next Friday. The paperwork has been sent off and if the funds are there, we are good to go.
Since this is such a long funny story (and still will make you laugh your head off), I decided to try to keep this post short, so please enjoy...

Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.

Colonoscopy Journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.

A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.

Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.

I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'

I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.

Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle.. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet. After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.
At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said.. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point.

Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me. 'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies... Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3.. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay..'

And the best one of all:
13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'
~~~Heavenly Father, thank you for the blessings of visits with loved ones and for little stray going through the heartworm medicine without ill effect today at the vets office.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

And The Rod Came Tumbling Down...

While there are thrills and chills to lots of excitement, the advantages of peaceful and calm far outweigh the excitement, at least for me, at least for these past several days.
Friday started all of this when I decided to walk our dog in the morning and start a new healthy routine for both of us. We got through more than half the walk when this stray dog started coming towards us barking and wagging her tail. She came out of a neighbor's garage and fortunately I knew this neighbor and she was home. Robin said that it was not her dog, nor was she dog sitting. The dog was overly friendly and sad looking too with those bloody stitches in her not so long ago cropped ears (enough to make one wonder about cropping the ears of the wackos who decided this was a good idea and on a grown dog!). So I take her to our backyard, write a lost dog sign and go with Tinkabelle to the front of our little subdivision and put it by the exit. When I realized her owners were 'cruel', I immediately removed the sign (well, Michael did).
As for our most recent adventure, here is some info I found on the Internet, although Michael is going to do it in a more conventional way....
"This Is a Hole Up
Repair a hole or gouge in a slab door with auto-body filler.
After it sets, hide the repair by sanding it smooth and then
painting over it. If you are filling a hole in an interior door,
substitute water putty for the auto-body filler."

Which brings me to the excitement awaiting us when we returned home from church on Sunday! Poor Kelly came to the car and hated to tell us yet more disconcerting news. It seems she heard a VERY loud crash in the house and thought someone had broken in but instead it was our 10'4' clothes rack and shelf in the master bedroom closet that had ripped out of the wall!!! We strongly suspect PG (Pretty Girl) our cat of having tried once again to jump on the shelf and it finally could take no more. Worry over PG possibly being under the clothes and boxes on the shelf caused us to all panic and clear everything out...good news...she was elsewhere and in good condition but probably traumatized.
Here are some of the holes Michael has already filled with putty...

And another section....

Still another part...

Finally, the nice big hole that will require more than putty......

Here are some of the repair things he bought, but he also plans on putting up a sheet of plywood and nailing it to the studs before he puts up new shelving (the old one actually has a big curve in it now...but we will save what we can and use it in the garage).....

This will hopefully be part of the hole repair project....

If you move this over to the driver's side and include the whole headlight and front grill as being removed, you will have an idea of Kelly's car after she hydroplaned. Of course that doesn't include the fact that the car spun completely around and the rear passenger light got smashed up as well. Isn't it just too wonderful that she was unhurt and okay?.....

This goofy cartoon is supposed to be at the bottom with the rest of the jokes, but it would NOT let me drag it down, so here's a 'smile break' from all this craziness going on here...

This is the female pit bull that was wandering around our neighborhood and this is what she does when you try to take a picture....
The first thing Michael said was "WHAT HAPPENED TO HER POOR EARS...THEY LOOK BUTCHERED??" Fortunately for all of you, you cannot see the stitches and bloody stuff in these pictures...
She was also over bred as her teats have no resiliency and she's only about 2-3 yrs. old, according to our vet where they also took out her stitches, cleaned up her ears some more (I had been putting gobs and gobs of Neosporin on them with a Q tip) and gave her shots and tests . She has no intestinal worms but she does have heart worms and she needs to be spayed. Once again today I am going to continue calling around to see if someone will have financial pity on us and this puppy dog and give a discount so we can get her in adoptable condition...

The vet said she is a blue point and a super sweet pit bull. We discovered that we can get much better pictures with treats....

I had been in contact with a pit bull rescue site but she (the owner of the site) hasn't written back to me since Saturday. She did say there is a chance of finding a home for her if she's spayed and treated to get rid of the heart worms...

It has been pouring rain here and Tinka's old doghouse leaks so we have brought this dog inside where she has been perfectly behaved, not even attacking the cats or chewing up anything or having any 'accidents'...

We would consider keeping her ourselves but my daughter would not come to visit any more with the three grandbabies as she has read too many sad reports about pit bulls and she also said that my son and daughter-in-law would probably feel the same. I did speak to many, many people who work with and have had pit bulls (including our vet) who say that they have gotten a bad reputation due to what people have 'trained' them to be. So hopefully today will be a little less stressful as I call and call again to see what can be done about this sweet little dog.
The good news with Kelly's car is that we found a place that will fix it and is 'affordable'...the first place she went to quoted her over $5,000.000 to fix it!!! For awhile she will have a car with maybe a red hood and blue fender and white body but it will be safe and we can try saving for a paint job in the future.
The great news with the closet rod ripping out is that Michael was totally cool with and so was I. It was almost like comic relief and I'm actually excited about going through all of this stuff and giving lots away. Another God moment occurred yesterday when I got a phone call from "INSPIRE" and they were calling to ask for clothing donations for the homeless!!!!
Let's laugh alot.....

A doctor, a farmer and the president of an HMO (Health Maintenance Organization) arrive at the pearly gates. St. Peter hesitates, because heaven is getting kind of full. Finally he tells the doctor, "You may go in, for you have taken care of the sick in their time of need." Then he turns to the farmer and says, "And you, too, may enter for you have grown food to nourish your fellow man." Then St. Peter turns to the HMO executive. "Well, I guess you can come in too, but only for three days."
Seen printed on the back of a Motorcyclist's leather Jacket:
If you can read this my girlfriend fell off.

More Headlines and Ads:



GROUND BEAST: 99 cents lb.





* On Sears hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.
(Or at least let us send a photographer over if you do.)
* On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(Contact Superman for more information.)
* On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.
(NO, instead use it like fancy soap and just tell us how you that.)
* Some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(Unless you like your food extra crunchy and tasteless.)
* On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head.
(For those of you with two heads, please call the front desk.)
* On Tesco's Tiramisu desert: Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
(This is located in the grocery aisle that says all shoppers must lay on the floor in this aisle if they are going to read ANY labels...disclaimer that is no longer just in the parking lot... "Not responsible for any damage caused by shopping carts.")
* On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.
(Surprise, surprise...)
* On packaging for a Rowenta Iron: Do not iron clothes on body.
(This is for those who are desperate to remove body wrinkles.)
* On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(Not only does the cough syrup contain alcohol but the label makers have been drinking alot of it too.)
* On Nytol (a sleep aid): Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(This is enough to keep you awake worrying about the manufacturer.)
* On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children.
(Keeping out of adults is also a very good idea.)
* On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only.
(A few restrictions do apply to using these in outer space.)
* On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.
( After reading that I'm not sure I want to use it for any use!)
* On Sainsbury's Peanuts Warning: contains nuts.
(Also this warning has been printed by nuts.)
* On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(They forgot the important parts of chew and swallow.)
* On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Wouldn't you know it? They take all the fun out of operating a chainsaw!!)
~~~Loving Father, thank You for the blessings of so many solutions and please help us find a very loving home for this little abused dog and not get stressed about it all.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Random Friday Favorites and "REAL" photos

Now I just have to hope and pray that none of you goes into catatonic shock because this WHOLE post contains 'real' pictures, not a single one snagged from the Internet (bet you thought I was hooked and couldn't break the habit by now). These are random but wonderful favorites. First we have some exceptionally lovely flowers sent to me for my birthday by a very dear friend...

Next we have something strange (imagine me posting something strange!) but you can blame this on Wanda @Moments of Mine because she has those gorgeous breath taking mushrooms that she takes photos of, so here are some night time mushrooms that popped up all over our front lawn after a heavy rain about a week ago....

Here's a tiny baby one (you know I love everything baby)....

This was the biggest one and you even get have a few free weeds thrown in with it (aren't you lucky?)...

They formed a cute little path as if they were going somewhere...

When I originally looked at these very dark photos, the mushrooms looked like they were glowing, but they seem to have lost their glow...where or where did it go?.....

These guys pale in comparison to Wanda's mushrooms so it's okay if you go pshaw to them...

Kelly went out and hand picked them all so we wouldn't spread the spores when we mowed...

Time for some color, folks, so here we have three giraffes (one lost its' get up and go), one poodle and one mouse that I got when I went to my friend's grandson's three year old birthday. Things like this make it worth going to a three year old party....

As I have shared before my daughter Ria doesn't want her pictures or her family on the Internet, so this slightly blurry and from the back snap shot should still pass inspection. That's little baby Julia with her.....

Here's adorable Julia's little feet in croc shoes (they finally found the missing one) which are funny frogs and her mom had told her to cross her feet so that we could push her on her little tricycle...

Here I am with my friend Carolyn (with the lovely hat her daughter gave her for free) and her daughter Sharon at the three year old party in Columbus, GA. Do you think her daughter looks like her? That pink hair probably comes from some great great grandparent...

Here's Sharon again...boy she really knows how to dress. Anyone want me to ask her where she shops?....

This is a stray dog that Sharon's husband picked up on his way to work, but they had not yet found the owners...
Before we get to the funny part (maybe I should say funnIER part) of this post. I would like to share with you my thanks to Our Heavenly Father for watching over Kelly yesterday evening when her car hydroplaned and is now basically totalled but driveable. She is safe (thank You, thank You dear God) and hit only the abutments but the car is pitiful looking. Today we will find out if anyone can duct tape it back together without costing a fortune or if we have to look for another used car for her.
It was a double whammy day yesterday as I found a very shy and friendly pit bull female who recently had puppies and her ears cropped while I was walking Tinkabelle, so I am sending ardent prayers that her owners are loving inspite of the fact that her ears were cropped as an adult (she still has stitches in them) and that she has had puppies already. We checked for a chip locator at our vets and there is non but we can call the only local vet who (sadly) still crops ears.
I found this on the (where else) Internet and it was labeled "Women's Five Toughest Questions"
(I just pray the hubbies out in blogland know the right answers or the insurance questioning may be done by the wives!)

"The questions are:
1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e., tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

Question # 1:

What are you thinking about?

The proper answer to this, of course, is:

"I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."

This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:

A. Football.
B. Golf.
C. How fat you are.
D. How much prettier she is than you.
E. How I would spend the insurance money if
you died.

(Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!")

Question # 2:

Do you love me?

The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include:

A. I suppose so.
B. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
C. That depends on what you mean by love.
D. Does it matter?
E. Who, me?

Question # 3:

Do I look fat?

The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are:

A. Compared to what?
B. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly
C. A little extra weight looks good on you.
D. I've seen fatter.
E. Could you repeat the question? I was just
thinking about how I would spend the insurance
money if you died.

Question # 4:

Do you think she's prettier than me?

Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:

A. Yes, but you have a better personality
B. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
C. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
D. Define pretty
E. Could you repeat the question? I was just
thinking about how I would spend the insurance
money if you died.

Question# 5:

What would you do if I died?

A definite no-win question. (The real answer, of course, is "Buy a Corvette.") No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:
Woman: Would you get married again?
Man: Definitely not!
W: Why not, don't you like being married?
M: Of course I do.
W: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
M: Okay, I'd get married again.
W: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
M: Yes, I would.
W: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
M: Where else would we sleep?
W: Would you put away my pictures, and replace
them with pictures of her?
M: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
W: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
M: Of course not, Dear. She's left-handed."
~~~Lord, thank You for the blessings of being safe under difficult circumstances and counting those blessings.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Smile and shake your Head...It's Time for Goofiness

We are overdue for some goofiness and craziness as there has been too much sadness or badness going on in the world. So sit back and relax with a friend, like this guy, but make sure the gorilla has the bigger sandwich...

Here's a great way to keep Santa incognito or get a great shot of yourself with a perfect expression on your face...

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so how much is a picture worth with a word ?....

Remember how Jackie @ Teacher's Pet always hid herself when showing herself taking a picture? So don't be scared if you see this individual out taking pictures, just walk up and say "Hi Jackie, we all miss you" (and she wondered why some of her shots were blurry)....

Love the crazy eyes on this beagle puppy dog...looks like he got into some beer...

If your neighbor won't be neighborly and chat at the fence, maybe the neighbor's dog will be neighborly (in your neighborhood, in your neighborhood...oh the neighbor's dog is a neighbor in your neighborhood)......

For all of you who have wondered about this, just hang on and Neil will be back as soon as he checks the mail for God's answer...

This is how I picture alot of you wonderful people before your morning coffee (since I am not a coffee drinker this is just my all purpose look)......

Can't quite figure out what he went after on the end of that pole, but there must be a better way to get it (what is that thing and why is this guy sideways?)....

This little kitten must have shared a few laps of the beer that beagle was obviously lapping up...

Wow...a sale is a sale and I would LOVE to get these for Michael (for those of you who are saying, surely she is just joking...NOPE, I would REALLY buy these for him!) sorry I missed this one!...

Woodpeckers can be nothing but trouble, so don't take them along on your next Ark trip...

Except for the fact that she's sooooo young, this could be Lisa in Colorado @Are We There Yet? visiting Sarah in Hawaii @So...This Is The Road I Am Traveling On.....

Just in case all of this wasn't quite silly enough, here are some real life and real goofy questions and answers...

◦Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?"
◦Witness: "There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet."
◦Lawyer: "Can you identify the rifle?"
◦Witness: "Yes. There was something written on the side of it."
◦Lawyer: "And what did the writing say?"
◦Witness: "'Winchester'!"
(So, make sure you write down and ID all your valuables like that Maytag washer and the GE stove, your Rolex watch etc. so that they will be easily found and returned to you too!)
◦Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
(The main reason he was put in jail was that they felt someone needed to protect him from himself, so they can't even put him in solitary confinement because he'd be keeping bad company.)
◦Lawyer: "Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?"
◦Witness: "Yes."
◦Lawyer: "Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?"
◦Witness: "Yes, sir."
◦Lawyer: "What did she say?"
Witness: "'What disco am I at?'"
(See what happens when you end a sentence with a preposition? go straight to jail!)
◦Lawyer: "Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--"
◦Witness: "Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
(This lawyer is so 'pleased' with the witness that he will probably try to get jail time for him too.)
◦Lawyer: "What happened then?"
◦Witness: "He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
◦Lawyer: "Did he kill you?"
◦Witness: "No."
(Now, wait a minute, Mr. Witness, don't rush your answer...think it over CAREFULLY.)
◦Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
◦Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."
(First let us question the first lawyer with several of his own questions and see if he can answer ANY of them.)
◦Lawyer: "Do you drink when you're on duty?"
◦Witness: "I don't drink when I'm on duty, unless I come on duty drunk."
(This guy is just downright scary.)
◦Lawyer: "Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?"
◦Witness: "The victim lived."
(Those victims just ruin it for everyone but they do give this lawyer a chance to show his "brilliance".)
~~~Thank You dear Lord for the blessings of comic relief and a way to refresh ourselves and go 'tackle ' the world with a smile.