Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Septic Tank...the final frontier...er, episode

Lots of busy days, lots of mass chaos, but here comes the final story of the sad septic tank. How were we to know he was so upset? While I am pleased that all that came out of the downstairs toilet twice was laundry and dishwasher water mixed with a few noxious fumes, it was still not something that warmed my heart.
When calling the gentleman who pumps out septic tanks (thank You Lord for these people and their lack of smelling ability) we were unaware of the surprises that lay ahead.
Michael had been told that our septic tank was waaaayy out in the back yard...wrong...so wrong and in so many ways. Two or three years ago we had our patio size enlarged and a little sidewalk put in and guess what? It was poured right over a huge part of the septic tank, making it inaccessible for the pumping.!!
This left us two options...tear up the concrete and leave it messed up that way or wait until Monday when the driller guy could just barely drill a hole near enough to the part of the tank that needed pumping, so we opted for waiting.
Need I describe what a delight that week-end was? Have you ever had to run to two different grocery stores to go potty or to work for a shower??? Michael tried to avoid having anyone see him as he slipped into work to shower in the little used small gym in the basement...it was a nervous shower as he still worried that the big female security guard on duty might decide to check out why someone was using the almost never used shower.
When everyone showed up on Monday morning I was one happy camper, although I did learn how to wash dishes and clean floors without letting any water go down the drain. The drill guy drilled, the pump guy pumped, but these people have burned off any sense of smell they may have had and they failed to warn me to close the door!!
The picture below would have been me, but not knocked over from sweet flowers for sure...

There weren't any smells like this coming up...

I love the smell of carnations but they wouldn't have stood a chance against the evil powers of the smell...

The cap they put on top looks a little bit like one of these...

The truck looked like this except not but it did have some words on the side and they should have been...KEEP FAR FAR FAR AWAY (go the the next State at least)FROM HERE FOR THE SAFETY OF YOUR NOSE AND YOUR NEIGHBORS' AND YOUR PETS' ETC. ETC.

Isn't it time for some funny snickers now and a stop to this potty talk (and to think I did a post on potty mouth and now I'M talking potty!!!)....

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The
ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve
you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

4. A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and
says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this
taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home."
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"Well, It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to
Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true; no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing
to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I
couldn't find any.

12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,
"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"

The doctor replied, "I know, I amputated your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and
says, "Dam!"

16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in
the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't
have your kayak and heat it too.

17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were
standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.
After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them
to disperse.
"But why," they asked, as they moved off.
"Because," he said. "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open

18. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes
to a family in Egypt , and is named 'Ahmal.' The other goes to a family
in Spain ; they name him 'Juan.' Years later, Juan sends a picture of
himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her
husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband
responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time,
which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate
very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he
suffered from
bad breath. This made him (oh, man, this is so bad, it's
good) ... a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

20. A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out
that there was a small medium at large.

21. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to
his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make
them laugh. No pun in ten did.

~~~Thank You Lord for the blessings of the many happy endings in our lives that we take for granted and even overlook, we really DO mean to be grateful.


  1. Hi Marcy,
    I loved the title of this post. It was priceless,which I imagine you had wished that the septic problems would be!
    I do hope that everything is under control now!
    Seriously Marcy, I'm glad that mess is over with,it did not sound like fun at all.
    I hope you have a Blessed Thanksgiving.
    Love Di

  2. Yuck! You poor thing!
    I remember when we had a summer cabin in upstate New York and we had to put in a new septic system, I ended up taking the kids back to the city for the week! So happy I had another place to go to!

    So glad that this is all just a not-so-great memory for you now!

    Loved the jokes, especially the Deja Moo one and the Mahatma Ghandi (leave it to Marcy POPPINS to find that one)!

    Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
    Love to you!,

  3. Hi Marcy,
    So sorry you have been so 'deep in doo doo', and what an ordeal! You seem to have made it through with your 'sense of humor' though. : )

    Hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving, and a Blessed holiday. (((HUGS))) T

  4. Oh, Marcy! I feel your pain! Living out in the country in an ooooold house, we've had two old septics fail on us. YUCK! And we didn't even know we had two until the one failed! Bluck. And, then, one time, there was this a.w.f.u.l. smell coming up from our cellar, and we thought it was a septic problem again, but -- after a hunt -- and a plumber-- it turned it was a pipe that connected to our bathtub drain that had burst in a basically inaccessible place under our house. Joy. But, the good news was that there was a strange, deep indentation under the house that held all the water while it slowly sank into the ground -- all the while getting stale and very, very smelly. Ick. Fixed now, though, thankfully. I'm so glad your problem has been diagnosed and fixed! Isn't life good?

    (BTW: to make a long post longer.... I just have to share with you that I've been getting the biggest kick out of your jokes this morning, and texting them out to various and sundry children's and friends' cell phones as wake up calls. &:o) There's a little bit of Marcy flying around all over this morning!)

  5. Plumbing. Isn't it grand when it's all a flush?

    Loved the jokes. I like all those play on words. ;)

    Happy and blessed Thanksgiving!

  6. Dear Marcy,
    I'm so glad to hear that everything is sorted now. What a nasty thing to happen to you! I hate when there's something wrong with the house -your home is your sanctuary, so it's a bit unsettling when things go wrong. But, having said that, at least they're only things. Oh dear, I have just used "thing" five times in one paragraph -I must be tired...
    Big hug,
    Marina x

  7. It hardly feels right to be laughing at this (laughing like a drain I was going to say but that WOULD have been naughty). It's funny though or maybe it's the way you tell 'em. "Poor Marcy" I was trying to think, with my poker face, then came the funnies and moi was LOL-ing and ROFL-ing like nobody's business.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

    love, Angie, xx

  8. Marcy...I love the graphic of the guy on his back...noxious position....and where do you find these! They go so well with your post. You do a lot of looking and research, girl.
    I'm so so sorry that you had to come home to such a mess...and then to endure it through the weekend, too. But, there was little choice. I wouldn't have torn up my patio, either. You guys are such troopers.
    I read every single joke...and laughed and laughed. I love those, Marcy.
    May your week be better...and better.
    Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.
    Smiles from Jackie

  9. Marcy,
    I'm so sorry you've had all those problems with the septic tank. Hopefully, now things will be okay. I sure hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

  10. What a fiasco, Marcy! I would feel like the most unlucky person in the world if I went through that septic tank ordeal!

    As for your list, can you believe someone sent that to me TODAY, and I was toying with posting it. haha! Now I don't have to ...

    Thank you for your kind friendship and support.

    God bless you and yours this Thanksgiving,

  11. Glad that stinking ordeal is over for you Marcy...fixed just in time for Thanksgiving. Hope it never happens again!

    I'm fixing dinner for 21 this Thanksgiving, so I will be extra busy tomorrow, but I will be thinking of each and everyone in the village.

    Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your family Marcy!

    Luv and Smiles,

  12. Marcy, I am so glad that all is fixed now and that you survived in one piece...I do wish you and your family a very Happy Thanksgiving..Hugs

  13. well i'm glad it all got taken care of!! that was quite an ordeal for you!! Glad you won't be smelling it over your Thanksgiving holiday!! The jokes are crazy - oh gosh!! Some times i pull up your blog at work just to read the jokes to my coworkers!!

  14. Oh Lordy!!! I have septic tank fear. We have one at our cottage and I'm always afraid of this sort of fiasco! We've never had it pumpem and don't know how often you should, and I really don't want to find out the hard or stinky way either!! I'm glad yours is back in good shape!
    Have a wonderful thanksgiving Marcy!!

  15. Hi Marcy!
    Sorry to hear your having such bad troubles :(
    Were you able to get my e-mail about being pen pals for this month? I have a card that I'll put in the mail for you tomorrow. I've still been under the weather, and Sarah had her surgery this weekend..it's been crazy around here. I hope you get your septic tank problems all lined out..that is awful!!
    Love and Hugs....Jerelene

  16. Sounds like "Green Acres" is now the place to be! (Didn't that theme song have something about the septic tank? And wasn't one of Erma Bombeck's books titled something about the Septic Tank?)

    The puns are wonderful! I'm going to copy them (with your blessing, I hope) and call them Thanksgiving entertainment. My family always enjoys such humor.

    Happy Thanksgiving, Marcy.

  17. Have a Wonderful Thanksgiving Marcy!!!

  18. Marcy, you could have cured it all by using an 'anti-septic'. Hmm! sorry! but I was entering into the spirit of the tank and just think it had to happen to you near "Tanksgiving".
    Seriously. I am very sorry you had such an awful experience.
    Which State is receiving your present?
    Just loved the jokes.
    See you soon
    Hugs ~ Eddie

  19. I'm losing it! I put a 'Happy Thanksgiving' comment on your November 20 post!

    Anyway, you are such a Blessing to me and I couldn't enjoy my Thanksgiving without letting you know that!
    Have a good one!
    Love you, E

  20. Marcy, I am so glad that you were able to take care of that and NOT on the weekend because it happened to us! over a holiday weekend and we were charged DOUBLE! A huge mess too! So glad that you will have turkey smelling up your kitchen and not.....left over turkey! hehehe...hugs.... and miles of smiles..

  21. You probably have a whole new appreciation for corrected plumbing. What a story! I smiled at the part of the female security guard discovering your son in the work place shower. I pray that this Thanksgiving Day will bring real blessings to you, after ALL that you have been through this week.

  22. Sending our best wishes for you and your family to enjoy many Thanksgiving blessings. Your friendship is truly cherished.

  23. We have had septic problems before and I know the smell you talk of!!! I have often wondered how the people who work in the septics can handle it all day long. Hope everything is better now and you can finally use your own bathroom. Thank you for your kind words on my blog this morning and your prayers. I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!


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